The man with the gilded crotch…
Get distracted and scratch my nose.
Touch all the CEOs I can get my hands on
Turn my microplastic collection I’ve been hoarding in my body into gold.
Lead. Alchemy baby.
I’d “make a golden tree statue”, sell it for crypto, buy trump coins with it, go to his dinner, and shake his hand.
I like this plan. The first half made me hate it, which is a pretty good sign it’s hitting the right key points of environmental destruction, profiteering, crypto, bad crypto and buying influence, but then brings it back right at the end.
You’re going to have to be careful not to touch anything at the dinner before shaking hands, you wouldn’t want to give the game away too early.
You’ve got a point, I should probably just touch a rock and start the thing with that instead of a poor tree.
Starve to death, probably. Isn’t that what happened to King Midas?
Can you catch grapes in your mouth? We need more details on the rules.
I mean, there’s the time period where your not starving to death but, ya, you probably ded.
I mean I don’t see how you couldn’t do a feeding tube other than it’s going to be not great pulling that sucker out.
The liquid still touches.
So does air, or the thing you’re sitting on.
I imagine depending on the rules, this would turn the whole world into a gigantic gold ball, which would then collapse into a black hole or something.
High five a certain gold loving narcissist
It would be fitting that his hand would be stuck upright in that “awkward hand gesture”
Get a pair of chain mail gloves. Put them on and they turn to gold and still function as gloves.
Then wear my gold gloves around at will, using my gold touch to further materials science.
Jerk off.
[Insert goldmember]
this certain mike myers movie was in my head when i read the prompt.
where though, i cannot say
Turn everyone I hate into gold and then melt them down and make golden urinals out of them.
Found trumps account
I want to say I’d strategically accrue wealth and use it to make the world a better place, but realistically I’d probably just end up running around turning random stuff into gold and totally crashing the gold market.
I would attend political rallies and be sure to be up front for shaking hands.
Masturbation is out so, probably something productive.
