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Brother the protocol is called activity pub(lic)
I guess you didn’t get satisfactory answers from your first post, but you still haven’t clarified what you actually mean by your question. All Lemmy servers run Lemmy, so in some senses of the term, they’re all roughly equally private, which is to say not very, because all posts & comments are publicly scrapable, except for private messages.
A community of privacy and FOSS enthusiasts, run by Lemmy’s developers
I want to make sure that I don’t get doxxed at any cost.
This just boils down to basic opsec. Be careful what you post/comment, continue to use a generic username, stuff like that.