Thanks, it’s always nice to start the day off with a good laugh.

I don’t know if I’d be so quick to jump to racism for that. I think most people see an attractive person and think “damn, they’re hot”. If after a while they find themselves thinking this about a particular group more than others they’ll start thinking they have a thing for that group.

I think it’s creepy when people get super specific about the range of skin tone, nose, eye shape, hair texture, etc. that they like. When someone has a detailed list like that I find it objectifying, like they’re selecting options on a car (or sex doll).

Maybe the person in your example does have a thing for Namibian women. But unless they asked invasive questions about every striking woman they encounter I don’t think they’d ever realize it unless they’re from the region.

Add to that the specific example of someone from the U.S. where ancestry can be mixed and uncertain. The person from your example might think they’ve died and gone to heaven if they ever visit Namibia but walking around an American city I think they can forgiven for just thinking they like black women.

My understanding of fetishizing is that it has little to nothing to do with physical characteristics, but is instead determined by stereotyping.

Saying you have a preference, even a strong preference, for physical traits that are more often, or even exclusively, found in a certain group is simply what you’re attracted to. Saying you prefer partners from “X” group because (insert list of stereotypes) is fetishizing.

For one example, consider the language that incels and people looking for “trad” partners use. They talk about preferring certain ethnic groups because they think all women from those groups are submissive, more feminine, adhere to traditional gender roles, etc., that’s fetishizing.

I’m glad our fuck up in the US is inspiring others to step back from the edge. It’s at least a silver lining I can console myself with while everything crumbles around me.

Yeah, they kind of had a point until they busted out the incel-speak at the end.