I’m a bi woman and have always preferred women. But I ended up falling in love with a wonderful man who is now my husband. I’m currently really grateful for that. Loving a woman in this climate would be so stressful. I’m very scared for my trans best friend though.
Can’t be good for the quality. I already get a lot of errors in my native language: the correct translation to my native language is not accepted and the “correct translation according to Duolingo” is grammatically wrong. So I keep getting errors for not using wrong grammar in my own mother language. This is going to keep getting so much worse and I have to wonder, if I’m even learning the correct grammar in the foreign language.
etwa wenn Menschen, die sich um einen Job beworben haben, nicht beim Vorstellungsgespräch auftauchen.
Und umgekehrt ist das einfach normale Praxis…
Was mich so am Begriff stört ist die inflationäre Verwendung. Mein erster Freund hat mich geghostet: Nach 6 Monaten Beziehung ist er eines Abends nicht zum Date erschienen und ich war auf allen Kanälen blockiert. Als ich zu ihm ging, hat seine Mutter gesagt er kann grad nicht. Sein bester Freund hat ein paar vage Andeutungen gemacht, dass ich dumm sei zu glauben, ich wäre jemals mit ihm zusammen gewesen (obwohl sein ganzer Freundeskreis mich ein halbes Jahr lang als seine feste Freundin kannte). Den Grund hab ich letztlich nie erfahren.
Heutzutage schreibt man ein paar Sätze auf Tinder und wenn die Person nicht mehr antwortet ist es direkt ghosten. Wenn ich mich nett mit jemandem in einer Bar unterhalte, komme vom Klo zurück und er ist schon gegangen ist das doch auch nicht ghosten. Vielleicht nicht nett, aber auch kein Drama.
Wieso sollte das auf dem Land nicht funktionieren? Ich bin in einem 900 Einwohner Dorf groß geworden. Die meisten Geschäfte waren um den Dorfplatz herum, der ein gutes Stück entfernt war von der nächsten Straße. Auf dem Land gehen die Leute nämlich die 5 Minuten zu Fuß zur Dorfmitte.
Falls du größere Supermärkte für den Wocheneinkauf meinst, die waren in unserer Gegend immer am Rand vom Dorf mit großem eigenen Parkplatz. In den Kleinstädten war es ähnlich, zumindest denen in unserer Gegend: Aldi und REWE an der Stadtgrenze mit großem Parkplatz, der Stadtkern eine große Fußgängerzone mit kleinen Läden.
Not even censoring, also outright stealing for karma farming. I’ve had perfectly normal photos being criticized as not within the rules for bullshit reasons. An alcoholic drink aggressively marketed in two “variations” for men in women in pointlessly gendered was taken down with the bullshit excuse, that men and women have different metabolisms so it wasn’t pointless. A week later there was a post about this drink with a lot of upvotes and my exact photo from our local supermarket. It was posted by one of the very active accounts. Mods are taking down promising content in some subs just to post it themselves.
The straight-A student who could have gotten into any course at any university with her grades ended up getting a degree in art history and works at a museum now. She was never much into art in school, mostly focussed on chemistry actually and thought about studying medicine or biochemistry when we graduated.
Another straight-A student never left our 900-inhabitants village. Everybody thought he’d surely make it big, study medicine or engineering or something like that and work for a big company. He’s working at the small local bank.
On the other hand, one of the girls who was always very anti-school and didn’t care much for grades (I don’t actually know how good her grades were, but definitely not among the top students) is a lawyer at a large law firm now.
NRW. Rheinland, um genau zu sein. Hier gibt es auch seeehr viele “Wir haben das schon immer so gemacht”-Leute.
You know what the worst thing is? He wasn’t the only one by far. Later at a different company another Teamleader told me I have to go out to eat with everybody. When I said the restaurant isn’t save for me (lots of nuts on the menu), he just said I HAVE to come and that’s what the Epipen is there for. I complained to HR and the HR lady asked why I don’t just do a therapy against allergies. Told me about some esoteric bullshit that’s supposed to cure all allergies and advised me to do that so I can better fit in with the company culture.
Just looking at the people around me (mostly colleagues, I’m not friends with this kind of people) it’s no surprise, when just about anything triggers them to vote AfD. Some actual examples:
“We have a vegetarian day at the cafeteria now. Stupid Greens forcing me to not eat meat one day a week. I’m going to vote AfD next election.”
“They built a new bicycle lane on my way to work. Now I’m forced to stick to the speed limit because of all the bicyclists on MY road blocking me. It’s a straight street, I should be able to go 80 even though it’s inner city. I’ve always been going 80 there! Stupid Greens, I’m going to vote AfD next election.”
“Supplier X stopped issuing their bikini model calendar. Everything is forbidden nowadays! Noone ever cared for bikini model calenders, but the Greens want to forbid every little piece of fun. Stupid woke culture. I’m going to vote AfD.”
And let’s not forget that one boss who told me that my life-threatening nut allergy was woke nonsense, because back in his day “everybody just ate what’s on the table and noone died, but nowadays everybody has to feel special by making up things they won’t eat.”
They just want to go back to 1950s culture, when gay people, trans people, allergies, ADHD, autism, veganism, climate change and anything other than straight white dudes and straight white housewives “didn’t exist”, because how dare the world be more complex than a Rosamunde Pilcher movie.
Breaking Bad. I liked it at the beginning, but it had too much violence for me. Or more specifically, violence being done as a crutch. Yeah, I get it, the character is ruthless and brutal yadayada. Lots of fake blood. Can we get back to the story?
A lot of the most popular Anime. I found One Piece pretty boring after the first few episodes. Same goes for Naruto. I do like Anime, but I mostly stick with shorter series that conclude the story in 20-30 episodes.
Black Mirror. The first couple of episodes were great, the rest was mostly the same with slight variations.
I feel like there is also a pathologization of being single. I was a teenager in the late 90s/early 2000s, so before most of social media. I’m also from a village where most people knew each other.
There were a couple of nerdy, shy guys who never had a girlfriend by the time of graduation. I only had one boyfriend at 16 for 2 month before his friend told me he was only dating me as a dare. I was “ugly” and “not a real girl” because I didn’t wear makeup and mostly wore jeans and Tshirts. Stupid village kids.
Anyway, similar things happened to the nerdy guys. But no one started crying about all men/women being awful and no one became an incel. Several girls and boys in my class never dated by the time we graduated and that just wasn’t a big deal. Nowadays everybody’s being told there’s something wrong with them if they’ve never had a partner by age 17.
I’m forty, so a different generation than your parents, but I still grew up and had my first dating experiences before the internet. Online dating wasn’t really a thing here until I was in my early twenties.
At least where I grew up the guys who randomly approached girls to ask them out were seen as creepy even back in the 90s. I and everyone I knew met partners through activities like sports clubs, parties, bars etc. (I’m not from the US, so people from my school started going to bars pretty early). While there wasn’t a big discourse around men approaching women in public (or none that reached my little town), we did have some guys in town who’d just walk up to girls on the street and ask them out and the consensus was that they were weird and should be avoided.
I met all my partners so far through activities. My first boyfriend was a regular at the same student café and we ended up sitting next to each other during quiz night. I met guys I had dates with in uni - sitting next to each other during lectures and talking about the Prof, going to the same presentation or cooking night etc. None of them “approached me” in the sense of coming up to me and asking “can I have your number” with zero context. We chatted, had an interesting conversation. At the end we exchanged contact information to meet for a coffee, usually without any expectation of it being a date. When coffee went well, someone would ask the other out on a proper date. No approaching, no deciding within a few seconds wether you want to date someone. Just casually getting to know each other before asking for more.
I also met my husband that way. We went to the same event, talked, had a lot in common. We met the next day to continue a discussion about a certain topic we were both interested in. That’s when things started getting flirty and by the end we made plans to meet for a real date. I don’t even remember who asked whom, we were both heavily flirting with each by the time we talked about seeing each other again so it was very obvious the next meeting would be a date. He didn’t ask me out out of nowhere or hit on me, we were just getting to know new people and eventually we started flirted somewhere along the line.