Connect with the local Deaf community. There’s likely a Facebook group or something that you can browse (even without an account). Look at local community classes, college courses, or even free classes held at a church. Our local community has a bi-weekly silent dinner at the mall and other events that hearing and Deaf people attend. I started with a local community center class ($50 for 8 weeks or whatever) and then found everything else through the instructor. I usually screenshot the silent dinner dates from the Facebook group and then attend when I can.

Paid refers to money. Payed is a nautical term.

I read the book Screentime Solution by Emily Cherkin (also Anxious Generation and Screen Schooled). Basically her advice is to be screen-intentional as a family. Right now my husband and I make an effort to put our phones away when we come home from work and spend time with each other and our toddler. Another thing is that she does not have any of her own internet devices. It’s the family tv and my iPad that she uses (with supervision and sparingly). We have a few devices she uses that are dumb (old gameboy and old iPod) but still rarely. Restaurants and family dinner are screen free zones. Even as she gets older we’re more likely to get a dumb phone and a family phone than let her have her own device. Something from the book was to let your kids have access to the internet and social media when you’re ready for them to see porn (not necessarily her opinion but an anecdote) and there’s no fool-proof parental controls. We are getting a family computer soon to teach her typing, using a mouse, and general computer skills but that will not be unsupervised or even internet connected most of the time. My goal is to teach her responsible use and to always have a line of communication open about it.

Just because a person doesn’t have a memory of a traumatic event doesn’t mean it doesn’t affect them. Kids can have lasting trauma effects even from things they were too young to remember.

I have ONE good picture of both of my dogs. I got it by taking a bunch and splicing two pictures together. Even then my one dog isn’t looking at the camera. He refuses.

I didn’t do the marriage thing because of love. I don’t need a piece of paper to tell me that. I did it for the logistical stuff. Buying a house. Having a kid. Combining finances. Life insurance. Health insurance. While all of this could be possible without being married, it’s much easier to have a marriage certificate than to try to prove to everyone all the time that we’re partners. If my husband were in the hospital on life support, being next of kin would simplify so many things. My culture is designed in a way that traditional marriage shapes so many processes. There may be workarounds, but they’re not always simplified and most people may not know how to use them. That can take valuable time that you don’t always have.